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Love + Relationships | Should Women Make the 1st Move?


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Recently on Veria Living, Siggy Flicker, relationship expert, matchmaker and television personality (VH1 reality television series “Why Am I Still Single?!”), offered her best tips for all the single ladies.

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Watch this short clip of the episode and find her tips from the show below!

  1. LOOK UP – We are constantly starring at our phones. But you know what you could be doing with those moments (besides, watching the sunset or actually listening to a friend)? Chatting with men around you. If all the ladies in the bar are on their phones, who will attract the guy’s attention? You.
  2. DON’T GO TO A BAR WITH OTHER SINGLE WOMEN – Would you take an unemployed friend with you on a job interview? Of course not. When you want to see who’s out there, take loving friends in healthy relationships. That way you won’t be competing with one another.
  3. IN FACT, GO OUT ALONE – Our fear of rolling solo is one of the reasons we’re constantly tinkering with our devices. It’s like, “I’m so popular that I must tweet right now!” But when you’re eating a meal or sitting at a bar alone, the message you’re projecting is a sexy and confident “I’m totally comfortable with myself.” Magnetizing!
  4. TEXT HIM BUT LET HIM TAKE THE LEAD – Sorry, but it’s still true that men like the hunt. Let him initiate the interaction, but don’t respond rapid-fire, and don’t text five times to his once. Every time you text, you’re saying, “I’m thinking of you” – which is totally fine, but he should say it as much as, or more than, you.
  5. AVOID ALL BLACK – It’s summer: Wear some color! I know you love your black leggings and that motorcycle jacket; so do I. But when you wear dark clothes, it can seem intimidating. Try a flirty sundress and see if you feel more approachable.
  6. START TALKING – For the love of God, speak up on a first date! Please! But don’t give away your life story. Your date doesn’t need to know your favorite sex positions…yet. TMI right away is an attempt to force intimacy, and it can backfire.
  7. SURE, HAVE SEX ON THE FIRST DATE – But not if you genuinely like someone. Sometimes first-date sex is exactly what a woman needs. But if you’re truly into the guy, stretch it out. By doing so, you’re telling him it’s not just a hookup. When you do get intimate, it will be even more meaningful.
  8. EMBRACE REJECTION – The right guy will move heaven and earth to be with you. If a guy rejects you, he’s the wrong guy for you. Simple as that. Don’t give up on what you want and fall down a self-loathing rabbit hole because one guy didn’t recognize how amazing you are: Let go and move on to the next one.
  9. DON’T BE FAKE – Whatever your personality – loud and brassy; shy and reserved- don’t hide it. This goes for small talk, too: Don’t give out a compliment you don’t mean; don’t lie about your age (eventually he’ll see your driver’s license). The right person will be attracted to the real you. Fake it and you’ll get caught.
  10. STAY POSITIVE – If you act like being single is akin to the diagnosis of an illness, then “desperate and miserable” will flash across your forehead like a neon sign. Stop complaining and flip your attitude: Think, I’m free! I can date whomever I want.

**Special Thanks to Ashley Fidler Bond (Lippin Group)!

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