Breaking up is never easy, or so the song goes. There is always more than a single reason for a breakup. And it might not be only one half of the partnership that is entirely to blame. Sometimes things don’t work out. Sometimes someone does something that the other person can’t forgive or forget. But can your ex forget about you? If you’re wondering this, then you obviously can’t forget about them.
Knowing your ex is pining for you, or at least turning their attention to you is an enormous ego boost. But don’t forget, this can be kinda creepy too. Perhaps it all depends on the circumstances of the breakup. If you find that you really want your ex to be thinking about you, then chances are you’re not over it. Worse still, you’re not letting yourself move on.
Love is a funny thing. It can leave you heartbroken, and it can cause you to miss a person so much it hurts. But if that relationship wasn’t healthy for you both, then pining about it is even less so. Of course, if you’ve only just broken up, you need to give yourself time to get out of the habit of being with someone. It’s a culture shock to be on your own again. You need that period of adjustment.
So is your ex thinking about you? Is he reading everything he can find about how to get your ex back? Are you? If you’ve given yourself a couple of weeks, but everything is still raw, then you might want to talk to someone about it. Perhaps you can think back to the breakup itself. Did you see it coming, or was it a heat-of-the-moment argument that sparked it all off? Had you been happy, or were the cracks starting to appear? Define the reason for the breakup before you decide if you want to try and fix it.
If you do want to try and fix things, you need to think about the damage that has been done. Are you ever going to be able to forgive? And are you willing to forget? It’s not good to raise old issues next time you argue. Infidelity, in particular, is a really tough one to get over. Did you ever gather proof of him cheating on you? Did you ever ask him why? Sometimes it’s best just to let people go that have hurt you this bad.
Of course, there are some people that you should never bother with again. Anyone that has physically hurt you should be left on the sidelines. If they’re still thinking of you, then you need to get away from them, go someplace safe, and report them. There is never a valid reason for them doing that to you. It’s a good idea to seek support and counseling if this has happened to you, regardless of how well you’re coping with it.
If a relationship just fizzled out because the timing wasn’t great, perhaps now is a good time to find out if your ex is thinking about you. Do you have an old flame you never quite forgot about? And would you make contact with them now?